Female Sociopaths: Children and Childbirth

Yes, there are female sociopaths.
They’re just like male sociopaths.
Aside from one big difference.

Female sociopaths and children are a catastrophe… for the child and for the other parent. It’s less often talked about, but men are dragged through this nightmare as well as women.

While women are showered by the male sociopath/narcissist with promises of marriage and a house and kids, the female sociopath has the same effect on male prey by wielding a high level of sexual appeal. Along with that can be hints and promises of marriage or children.

They say that statistically there are more male pathological sociopaths than females… but tell that to the man – or the woman – ensnared and spiked through the heart by a female sociopath.

Females as Sugar and Spice

In the experience of this entanglement, gender matters not at all. It’s just as dangerous, devastating and potentially ruinous whether you’ve been sucked in by a male or female narcissist aka sociopath.

So…statistics say there are fewer female sociopaths than male sociopaths. But are there? Maybe. Or do they go under the radar in the stats count because we find them they to spot?

Is the female sociopath less likely to be recognized because, after all, aren’t all little girls made of sugar and spice?

Not when they’re sociopaths. All sociopaths, male or female or any gender are identical in purpose: they want and need to make use of others for their own ends. Our well being, mental and emotional health, bank accounts, and the very highly compromised safety of our children are the fallout.

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Apologies First

I’m sorry to tell you, but when that female sociopath / narcissist leans in and whispers that she wants to have your baby, she isn’t knocking on your hard wired primal DNA with this huge-little sentence because of the gorgeous and amazing man that you are. Nor is she saying it to you if you’re a woman because of her deep connection to you and your profound shared maternal desire. She does care about you or share anything with you.

She’s saying this to you no matter who you are because she’s a predator and is looking for lunch money – and because like any sociopath, she cannot help herself. The primary drive of a predator is to sink their hooks into something. What better way to attach yourself for life to another human than to make a baby with them?

This little whisper is bait. The female sociopath, as one of her lures, baits prey with promises of children. – And remarkably, this future hope, this ultimate declaration of love, commitment, devotion and validation is supremely effective bait; it drives in the hook more deeply and for longer whether those kids are ever come along or not.

Breaking Up With Evil

Breakign Up with Evil, by Jennifer Smith on Amazon and Good Reads

Breaking Up with Evil: Escaping Coercive Control on Amazon

Five women’s true stories of being ensnared, and hauled through the confusion, lies, fear, and pain, and breaking away.

Told in their own words, they leave nothing unsaid. Find validation and see new glimpses of the truth as they share their stories… Stories that could be any of ours.

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What Matters Most

In the escape and recovery, what we truly care about is getting away from the harm, understanding what just tore through our life, why, and how to never encounter this again – and how to keep our children safe if we’ve had them with this alternate type of human.

Firstly, it’s important to accept that the female sociopath (narcissist) is driven by the wiring in her brain to do the same things a male sociopath (narcissist) does. Here are some manifestations and markers of that brain:

Deliberately deceives others
Tell lies even when they don’t need to
Don’t realize that they could get the same result they’re after without the lie
Out of context suddenly divulge some (odd) new bit of story about their life
Present a sob story about their childhood or past
Take a victim stance within their portrayal of their lives
Let it slip by words or actions that they don’t mind that others are harmed

It’s this way of thinking and behaviors that are indicators of this abnormal brain. Whether male or female, there’s no possibility of a sociopath (narcissist) making loving connections, they see the world and all things within it as a a pile of toys that belongs to them.

Female Sociopaths, Male Sociopaths: All the Same Thing

Here’s how female and male sociopaths are alike:

All sociopaths think they’re superior beings to all other people
They’re proud of not having emotions
Sociopaths have flexible and genderless sexuality
They mimic normal people in order to seem normal and to gain trust
Sex is used as a tool or an animal release or fo rather entertainment
They have lots of people they scam at one time
Everything they say is a lie
Everything they say is to manipulate in order to take and not be caught
All sociopaths lie, steal, cheat, are violent and ruthless
There is no positive emotional bonding with any human being
They feel no like, love, care, concern or compassion for any living being

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Is This a Male or Female Sociopath Talking?

Can you guess which line was uttered by which gender of sociopath? These are actual comments uttered or sent in messages and emails by various sociopaths to a person they had ensnared:

You’ll never win, I can ruin you
I’m not like you, I don’t care like you do
I make everyone I date sick
I’m not white or hispanic, I’m not any race or anything…I’m a gray skin
You can’t beat me, I’ve been doing this since I was 17
That should be mine!
What’s that!? We’re not using that!! We don’t need to, I can’t have kids
I don’t know if you’ll even read this email…
If you’d trust me, everything would be okay
You don’t even know how many times I’ve brought other men/women in here
You only think you love me, you don’t know me
I’m not your average 22-year old
Do you think we look like that couple does when people see us?
I have them wrapped around my little finger
I’m about to get physical, you don’t wanna see that
I could make you jealous with women or men
I can’t make you do what I want, but I can make you wish that you had
If you knew who I really was, you wouldn’t love me so much
I’m not emotional
I don’t have empathy, I’ve tried to have it, but I don’t
I’m done with you, you’re useless

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A Sociopath is a Sociopath is a Sociopath

Could you tell any difference? Could you detect which chilling phrase was hissed by a female or a male sociopath? Probably not. Not really. They all say weird things that give themselves away and are the truth about how they see things, what they want, and how they feel in a nutshell: they give away what they are.

Female Sociopaths Children and Childbirth

Sociopaths are each and all fundamentally identical. Male and female sociopaths are identical in tactics, thinking, purpose and lack of conscience.

There’s a compounded difficulty and area of entrapment that arises due to our social assumptions and expectations around what it means to be female and what we believe motherhood is meant to entail or embody.

Female and male sociopaths have children to seem normal. Male sociopaths can populate the planet with their offspring and then abandon them. Never see them. Maybe never meet them from birth.

They use the kids to create an image of themselves as normal and to reflect their own awesomeness on Facebook and Instagram.

Male sociopaths use children, just as a female sociopath does, as a doorway back into their former target’s life whenever they feel a need to.

Sociopaths Use Their Children for Cash

Female sociopaths don’t seem to have the overwhelming desire to sprinkle the earth with their seedlings the way men do. Although there may be rare exceptions to this, the majority of female sociopaths avoid having many children.

There’re only a few raw reasons a female sociopath might go through the trouble and pain of having a child aside from the normalizing mask it provides. Children are carried, born, and tolerated in order to gain alimony and child support or property rights. This is often done along with marriage, sometimes not. This makes a female sociopath parent without a conscience stick tenaciously to their biological children as a meal ticket.

Having a baby or babies in lawful marriage leaves the female sociopath in a position of power to divorce and take alimony, property, and child support money that is meant to be all for herself.

When the Kids Are No Longer Useful

These children become less than adorable normalizing accouterment as they get older. Older children expect more, ask questions, and notice and can be outspoken about the unkept promises, mistreatment, neglect, and abuse from a sociopath parent. They suffer trauma and post-trauma, cognitive dissonance just as adults do. They too, try to fix it and to figure it out. This is dangerous and annoying to the sociopath parent.

This renders the children less useful and more of a liability once they reach puberty or early teens. And there’s that magic number of age-18 often means no more paycheck. As soon as the child maintenance is no longer coming in that kid is not worth much unless the child happens to be a huge fan of the sociopath and sticks by that parent’s side. Sadly, this means the child has remained deeply ensnared.

Unless a particular child is entrapped and mesmerized by the sociopath parent, mostly staying quiet about that parents lack, then ultimately the sociopath discards the kids, discredits them, smears them, and can outright demonstrate hatred for them.

Another reason for dropping their kid from their life is similar to how they handle adult prey; their interest wanes when the emotionally malignant parent is simply bored.

Think it sounds impossible? Read here – the clear and words of a self-proclaimed female sociopath about children:

I find… children to be completely intolerable. It can be very difficult dealing with… children because they behave so selfishly and unreasonably. If it were just up to me, no problem, I could just ignore or terrorize them. ~ Words of a Female Sociopath

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As a certified coach, upholding industry standards I strive to inform, educate, invite thought and dialogue, to co-plan, co-strategize, advise, consult, refer, recommend, train, teach, guide and coach people in guided recovery and discovery specific to these crimes, and from hell and broken in the aftermath to whole again, and more. You decide what winning is.