Weeping in despair, grief. Confusion.
A shattered life. Depression and self doubt. Isolation.
This heap of feelings and thoughts and questions
are the beginning of restoration.
We can heal even the PTSD after a sociopath or what many call a narcissist. It includes emotions rolling over us in grand sweeps and simmering cess pools. These turn to feelings and thoughts that are untrue. There’s a is terror in PTSD others around can’t us usually can’t understand… We might not understand it ourselves.
You owe it to yourself to realize what this PTSD is, how it shows up, how to heal and rebalance yourself, and that it’s okay to be in a sate of post truama so that we can restore our gorgeous selves.
Altogether it’s loneliness and fears and doubts that are not the new you but can seem like it. There are many signs of PTSD, but the initial stages are most described by one word.
PTSD and Broken is Not the New You
There’s one word that most often drifts up from the souls of those in the aftermath to describe how they feel. This is a brand new feeling for most of us and signifies the despair and fear… all in one small yet colossal word: broken.
It’s a word I’d never used to describe my life until then. And it wasn’t a word that came to me through “thinking”… it rose from somewhere inside my life and my mind whispered it one day as I looked in the mirror.
Later, once recovered to a certain point, I never felt that way again, but there was more recovery. PTSD stays around in different phases for much longer than we want it to.
How much of your life would you like to restore?
Self Care Never Meant So Much
Patience with ourselves during the cycle of recovery will get us through the backsliding and up-swings and finally, healing.
Some opt for therapy or counseling. Sometimes this is effective. Sometimes it is not. If a therapist is pulling out the “what was your part in it” routine, you could be in the wrong place.
It’s one thing to understand all this in theory, or from study; it’s quite another to know what this is firsthand and profoundly. And to have experienced it firsthand.
Please consider the sessions I offer. If it’s a fit, you’ll shift into another place of perspective and healing than you might have thought possible.
PTSD After a Narcissistic Sociopath is Normal
PTSD is the only state anyone could be in after what we’ve been through. We’ve been attacked: targeted, wrapped up, and dragged through a world of deceit, lies, deception, betrayal, illusion, and delusion by a being with a criminal mind who has no concern for us whatsoever.
This PTSD and feeling broken or ruined is not helped by relationship counseling concepts, not by relational concepts at all. – There was no relationship. We felt there was one – we lived it as if in a relationship – but they knew there wasn’t one. This was not a relationship, so…
None of this happens because of concepts such as codependency. You’re not in denial. It didn’t happen because you don’t have “boundaries”.
You’re going to hear a lot of people claim otherwise. I believe the concept of “setting boundaries” to stop the bad behavior of others arose out of so many of us being worn out and tired of the people who don’t heed boundaries. Exhausted to the bone by these pathological creatures who have no awareness of natural social boundaries.
Boundaries-Schmounardies
This thinking is misleading though… I find it off the mark. Why do we think, or why do others expect us to be the one magic person on earth these people heed? They aren’t going to give shoot about our “boundary setting” even if we wear them as a neon sign and stamp our foot at the same time.
For heaven sake, these are people who refuse to ear condoms, have multiple spouses, don’t pay taxes as a rule, and can kill if they need to. Why on earth do we think what we tell them to do or not do behaviorally would have made a difference?
There is no lack in us, no gap, no missing piece, no failure, weakness, failure or fault that allows or gives the right to these criminals to hijack our lives. They do what they do because of what they are. It’s time we take in what they are. – This is a piece of taming the PTSD and rebalancing the nervous system.
Dr. Martha Stout says in The Sociopath Next Door, published 2009: A person who has no conscience can instantly recognize someone who is decent and trusting. – The shameless know us much better than we know them.
Recovery From PTSD After a Narcissistic Sociopath
We need real support from those who truly understand what has happened. These aren’t relationships, they’re crimes. This in itself is a traumatic discovery we must find our way into or we really don’t fully restore our lives.
We’re left to recover our emotional, physical, mental, and financial health. Reconciling that nothing is real – not the sex, not the relationship, not one single moment was what we thought it was – this takes support.
There are answers. You can heal… and thrive.
Trauma and Shock Can Ravage Our Health: Take Care
Stress causes a great strain on our physical health. Taking super mega-stress protecting vitamins is recommended. Lemon juice in water with raw honey every day.
Brewer’s yeast tablets which provide “B” vitamins protecting the brain from stress, go a long way in repairing and safeguarding our mental and physical health.
Understand a Sociopath’s Mind
The bizarre, the terrifying, the painful – as well as the good times with the monster who raided our lives, will be in our minds almost constantly. Looking at these things from the mind of a sociopath puts everything in perspective. This allows us to see the truth and it sets us free.
This healing time is also a good time to find or dust off and renew faith. Faith in life, faith in a spiritual belief, faith in our own value, faith in the love of our children. – Find a core to anchor to. Reactivate your raison d’etre.
Revitalizing our purpose on this planet… Find a reason to go on. To stand up. To put our feet on the floor each morning and cause fear and evil to run.
What does “recovered” look like for you?
Restore your life and thrive.
Medications, Alcohol, and Drugs
During PTSD after a sociopath, we’re likely to look to different kinds of alleviation… including alcohol, weed or other drugs to handle the shock, overwhelm mind-blowing stress and trauma.
Even non-drinkers dive in for a glass or two of wine – or vodka – in the months of PTSD after a sociopath. – I did and my previous norm was a drink three times a year.
If you have a tendency to overuse alcohol or any substance you will surely find yourself out of control in PTSD after a sociopath. Take care.
Sad, Mad, Crying, Shaking
Acknowledge the sadness. When the weeping comes, let it. Say, “Hello despair. Leave your boots on, you won’t be staying long.” Giving a name to, and a nod to our emotions eases their sting and brings comfort and relief.
Remind ourselves when we sigh oh, so heavily for the 37th time in one day: “I feel sad right now. That’s okay. I’ll feel better later.”
Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Emotional Care are on the PTSD Recovery Menu
Give yourself as much care as you can. Massage, yoga, meditation, renewed faith, or a new faith. Keep in mind dating isn’t a recovery method and dating after dating a sociopath is for later. Much later.
No One Robs An Empty House: We Are Awesome
We are awesome, amazing, loyal, smart, magnanimous women, and men, that’s why the predatory sociopath targeted us to cast their spell upon. They needed our power to do their bidding.
Those same admirable humanistic traits and deep values they need to borrow to prop up their fake lives are what we use to see behind the mask. It is us who set ourselves free.
As normal, regular gorgeous inside and out humans, we’re supportive and forgiving, we hold humanity in high regard – some of the best of the best are the prey of sociopaths. Celebrate how wonderful we are.
There’s a way out of the labyrinth of hell. It is you. It is our inner beauty, strength, kindness, and compassion… shine them on ourselves. Embrace your life. You are awesome.
Here’s to REAL True Love and Happiness!
Time to Thrive!
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