Co-parenting in even the best of divorce circumstances is a juggling act with some dropped balls. In the ideal co-parenting set-up both parents are amiable and respectful.
No one says anything nasty about the other parent, and exchanges run smoothly and easily in cooperation. Both adults are focused on the well-being of the children whether visitation is court-ordered or voluntary.
Continue readingTrauma response is real. It’s also normal.
There’s nothing wrong with us.
In fact, our bodies are protecting us.
Go with it.
We’re truly amazing! Trauma response is normal, valid and to be honored. When our eyes are at half-mast, and it’s only 11:00 am. That time in the afternoon when our brain is mush… and by afternoon, I mean 1:04 pm. The wish from deep in our bones to curl up with Netflix or just nothing and do nothing but sleep…
Continue readingSociopaths, even though you
might be calling them “narcissists”,
must hook prey.
They’re constantly baiting…
Casting a “line” in order to hook prey.
Hooking prey is a user’s full-time job, no matter if you call them a sociopath or a narcissist. They hook prey with bait. Every time they open their mouth they’re tossing bait. Pretty much everything single thing they say or do is bait.
Continue readingRewire trauma sustained during
the relationship that wasn’t.
Bring up stored deep brain patterns of feeling good.
Rewire trauma sustained during what we thought was a real relationship. During these hijackings, trauma is sustained and prolonged. We undergo an overload on our nervous and adrenal systems.
Simple methods bring us from the dark side and into the healing zone. Humans are amazing. We can rewire our emotional experience for both health and well-being.
Continue readingLeaving is scary.
Their hounding and hoovering are traumatic.
In a panic, we might think we want a restraining order.
In cases of violence – maybe – we need one.
Thinking of filing a protection order? – Or restraining order as they’re called in the USA? This is often the first thought we have when trying to leave a toxic partner. This is frequently the first advice we hear from others when we tell someone about the fear and trouble we’re having with a breakup from a “narcissist”.
As much as this can seem like the logical thing to do, let’s talk about why filing a protection order is a bad idea.
Continue readingHeartless users are
über devoted to their fantastical lies.
And, when we unwind the lies they’re super mad.
Luckily, we’re so much smarter than they are.
The sociopath behind the mask is a monster. And they love it that way. They love being what they are. They’re also extremely limited in the way they think.
Every sociopath wears a mask of nice, sweet, handsome, awesome-guy or gal until the truth rips it off. All sociopaths are the same, it doesn’t matter if they’re male or female, their age or where they’re from. The pathological user is wired to hate, it isn’t personal, but let them think you’re going to expose them, and they come at you full force.
Continue readingThese creatures infamously talk up a storm.
It’s a trademark of a narcissist or sociopath.
Contact is their full-time work to ensnare,
entrap, and keep prey locked in place.
Gaslighting. That confusing babble that oozes from their gobs nonstop. This tirade of conflicting and hurtful and ridiculous nonsense, unfortunately, spins us up off our feet and into a frenzy of trying to “talk about it”. We want to talk it out and resolve their concerns. So kind of us; so normal.
Continue readingIt’s normal to trust, believe and care.
It’s 100% abnormal not to.
We can’t understand abnormal by looking at it from normal.
So, let’s look at it for their side without our rose-colored glasses.
Narcissistic people who are in the zone of pathological narcissism know that they don’t have relationships. Even though they step up to us with this mesmerizing zinger, I’ve never met anyone like you before. They know they’re not stepping into a real relationship. We think they are; that we are.
The thing is, they aren’t saying what we think they’re saying. We naturally hear one thing, but they mean another. They don’t want a relationship, not even when they say, you’re my soulmate. Want to know why this is…?
Continue readingCan we smell a narcissist?
Does the sociopath have a certain aroma?
As their abnormal brain affects their physiology…
how does it show up?
These are entirely different “humans”. The way they think, speak, and behave is not a “choice”. It’s instinctive. Their fundamental “self” is wired to use and take and get whatever they need and want. This “self” is pathological… meaning they’re driven by their brains which are not normal, yet are quite specific.
I wonder, since the sociopath’s abnormal brain affects their physiology how does this show up in all parts of their being? We know a lot of the things that they each have in common as creatures of this sort. (Or the “narcissist’s” if you’re on that terminology even with all it’s pitfalls and misconceptions.)
They’re fundamentally and pathologically identical monster to monster.
Continue readingCan you smell a sociopath?
Does a narcissist have a certain aroma?
As their abnormal brain affects their physiology…
how does it show up?
These are entirely different “humans”. The way they think, speak, and behave is not a “choice”. It’s instinctive. Their fundamental “self” is wired to use and take and get whatever they need and want. This “self” is pathological… meaning they’re driven by their brains which are not normal, yet are quite specific.
I wonder since the sociopath’s abnormal brain affects their physiology how does this show up in all parts of their being? We know a lot of the things that they each have in common as creatures of this sort.
They’re fundamentally and almost thoroughly identical pathological beast to pathological monster. For example, we know in their heads lies are real and real is made up.
Continue reading